Camping

It's fun, right? Sleeping outside, bacon and eggs in the morning, hot dogs over the campfire at night, smores, (I'll give you instructions for the perfect smore at the end of this post.)hiking, songs and memories being shared around the fire, water skiing in the a.m. and p.m. even if it is in a FREEZING.COLD.LAKE, and the stars in the sky...oh the stars.

Fun for everyone...except my sister-in-law Kirstin. She hates anything that takes her out of her comfort zone.

Kirstin spent the first two nights sleeping in the truck. She was in the shell of the truck on a lovely mattress, then on the last night decided she wanted to sleep in a tent. Paul set up a tent for her and after spending 20 minutes trying to convince her to "Just lay down!" he zipped up the tent and headed to bed. Two minutes passed. Then this is what we heard:
Kirstin: Where's my lotion? I can't find it.

two minutes of silence.

Kirstin: (a little more loudly)I can't sleep without my lotion.

two minutes of silence.

Kirstin: (louder and more angry)Is anyone out there looking for my lotion?

two minutes of silence.

Kirstin: (louder and more angry) Come on guys!! Where IS my lotion?!?!

five minutes of silence.

Kristin: (sweet as a peach) Never mind, found it. You can stop looking now.

five minutes of silence.

Kirstin: (loudly yelling) Okay, I'm done with the tent!

30 seconds of silence.

Kirstin: (yelling more loudly) I'm done with this tent! Hello? Get me outta here!

15 seconds of silence (except Ryan and Chris laughing)

Kirstin: (I'm pretty sure her eyes were turning green at this point) SORRY! I'M NOT MADE FOR TENTS. NOW GET ME OUT OF THIS TENT! DAD GET ME OUT OF THIS TENT! SOMEBODY HELP ME! DAD GET ME OUTTA HERE! GET.ME.OUT.OF.THIS.TENT!!!! GET ME OUTTA HERE!
DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD!

One day of our trip, every one was leaving for various activities. Ryan and his dad were going on a 20 mile bike ride. Everyone else was going on a hike that was much too long for Kirstin. I thought I'd stay back with her and take her on a hike. We hiked to the outhouse and back...100 yards...it was far enough. Then we resumed our seats in the camp chairs and belted out Carpenter's songs into our pen microphones. We sounded good.

The hikers returned mid "I'm on top of the world looking down on creation and the only inspiration I can find..." when Kirstin started to move her free hand in a back and forth motion I can't describe "is the love that I found ever since you been around..." Chris asked her what she was doing with her hand. Without missing a beat and with all seriousness Kirstin replied "Tambourine, Karen Carpenter had a tambourine. (continues singing) Your love puts me at the top of the world." Of course, a tambourine. Why didn't I think of that?

We were playing a dice game when she scored big, or little for that matter, she would say "I'll take my two hundred points, IN CASH."

One last story then I'll put it to rest. Paul was driving to the campsite towing his RV trailer. He was on a dirt road and took a turn, which was very unsafe in Kirstin's opinion, and she said "Heavenly Father, hallowed be thy name. Forgive my father for he knows not what he does." Now, name the movie she was quoting, thank you.

I wish I had stories to share about the trip that didn't invlove Kirstie, but she really was the highlight.

Please know I'm not making fun of my sister-in-law, I love Kirstin with all of my heart. I treasure my time with her. After all, when I'm with her I have someone to sing into a pen microphone with.

Kirstin Garff, incentive to marry into the Garff family.


Ryan and Paul in all their biking glory. Apparently Paul flips the bird at drivers and call them "Jerks" when he's riding.


Ryan...I get butterflies when he's putting the ski on. I just love to watch him.


Chris' silly wetsuit.


Since I poste the picture of his goofy wetsuit, I thought I'd do him a favor and post a picture showing how good he is, even wearing a diaper wetsuit.

Have I ever mentioned how much I love to hang out with Chris and Ryan on the boat? It's just...fun. I'm glad they let me tag along.

Gretchen Carr we wish you were a Movie Star!

Today is my last day of work for the week. Ryan and I are going to spend the long weekend here. We will be camping with Paul and Vi (Ryan's dad and his wife), Kirstin, Eric, Chris and two of his friends Adam who goes by Bruce and his wife Amy, I don't know the latter two people very well. I met them on the 4th, they have a daughter named Stella, they must be pretty cool.

Ryan went to the parade last year so I guess I can go to the lake this year.

Oh how I'll miss you marathon runners, stake floats with the theme "Still Pioneering Together", 1st Baptist Church choir, paper mache Salt Lake Temples, clowns on razor scooters, Costco muffins courtsey of Auntie Kim, marching bands, chants with the Lubbers, "Honk your horn" by Jeff, hoping for a Jazz float then being disappionted when there isn't one.

I hope you'll miss me, too.

I wonder if the retired Dick Norse will be making an appearance?

'Cause ya can can can!

I have the best neighbors a person could ask for. When I get home from work there are often fresh vegetables or fruit waiting for me on my porch. Last week I came home to so many apricots.



I canned them tonight after work.

Liz and Phoebe...Canning is easy, super easy. Buy the Ball Blue Book of Canning and a 21 Quart Waterbath Canner (I got mine at the DI for $3) and start canning. I do suggest buying a can grabber, they make grabbing the hot bottles out of the waterbath so much more pleasant. I also suggest a magnet stick grabber thingie for getting your lids out of the boiling water. You can get a complete starter kit here for about $50. Smith and Edwards also has a great canning selection.

Canning is my way of builing up my food storage. I think I'm going to chicken and beef next month, along with the gazillion tomatoes from my garden.

I admit you are better than I am.

I actually beat Ryan 3 games to 1 last night at racquetball. I could tell he was having off games, missing hits he would normally crush. But I didn't care. Until I noticed something. He was playing left handed. He said he can shoot a basketball just as well with his left hand as he can his right and he should be able to play racquetball just as well as a lefty.

I know he'll keep practicing left handed and eventually he be beating me that way too, but for now, I'll take the win.

Dead Bird.

Last night as I was walking out to water my garden I smelled something. It was the smell of death. You know what I saw on my window sill? A bird. I went to get Ryan, he was on the phone with one of his BFF's so he didn't show much interest. He just said mouthed "It's not dead yet." I plugged my nose and took a closer look. Sure enough, it looked like it was breathing.

Had this happened to my dad, he would've gotten a shoe box and a towel and decide he was going to nurse the dying bird back to health. Do you think that's what I did?

NO. I found a large rock and was going to smash it's head and put it out of it's misery. I put on a leather glove picked up the bird and discovered maggots were all over the underside of the thing. What looked like breathing was maggots moving inside the bird.

Now ask yourself if you think I felt badly that a bird rammed it's head into my window knocked itself out and died.

The answer again is NO. I just know this is one the birds that's eating at my garden.

Serves it right.

(Sorry no picture, I felt a little gruesome taking a photo of a dead bird just to go on and on about how I didn't feel any remorse for the thing.)

No Guts, No Glory

Deron Williams was on the radio last night. He said he's signing his contract today and that he loves Utah, he loves that it's not a big night life here, he loves that he can raise his family here, he loves the scenery. As Ryan was relaying this to me, I started to tear up. Yes, I cried real tears. I'm just so darn happy that Deron Williams is a Jazz man. I've been angry with everyone on the Jazz at least one game, Boozer played like he'd never touched a basketball in the playoffs, Okur, AK47, everyone has upset me at least once. Except Deron Williams.

Here's to you D. Will. I love ya.

Redbox

I was grounded from Redbox for a little while. I rented 3 movies and kept them 7 days. Yesterday I decided to give myself a second chance. I got 2 movies and planned on watching them both last night, turns out I'm not such a night owl. I made it through one then went to bed. I was determined to watch both movies and have them back today by 9. Sounds easy, right? Wrong ping pong. Thursday night was already booked. I was left with only one option.

I woke up this morning and went to the gym, came home and had a protien shake while I watched my movie. Ryan told me that's a productive morning, watching a whole movie before I even have to shower for work. I would say it would've been more productive if I folded laundry while watching. I would actually say it was a little crazy. Watching Fools Gold at 6am?

Matthew McBugsme was annoying as ever.

I think my lipth are thwollen.

I didn't drink nearly enough water on the 4th of July. I didn't realize how badly I was dehydrated until we got back to Chris's house and my lips were "chapped real bad". (Name that movie.) The next day Ryan and I went to Mike and Amy's to help them build their fence. I drank water all day and only went potty once. TMI, I know. I've now been blessed with 6 cold sores. Yes, 6 of them.

My lips are swollen. Chapped and swollen. I was making dinner last night and felt drool on my chin. It's like I've been to the dentist and the anesthesia hasn't worn off yet.



I think I'll get a glass of water right now.

What is it with me and food?

I have a confession. I've hemmed and hawed (I have no idea if that's how you spell hemmed and hawed but I say that all the time.) I've hemmed and hawed about whether or not to blog about this story. Well, I've come to a conclusion. I would rather make people laugh than hold back such a gem of a story, even if I am the object of the laughter.

I was at work a couple of weeks ago and I didn't bring my lunch. I had a protien shake for breakfast at 5:30 in the morning and those things only hold me over for about 2 hours. I was starving. I had the shakes. I couldn't concentrate. I don't like to eat fast food lunches, I don't want to spend the money, I mean they have too many calories. Just as I was contemplating forking out 5 bucks for Wendy's, I saw it. My co-worker had thrown away a bag of Sour Cream and Chives potato chips. She brought some from home in a gallon bag, ate what she wanted and threw the rest away. What was a girl to do? I didn't even hesitate. I snatched that bag right out of the garbage and ate every last crumb.

I guess I can relate to this guy.


I don't regret it.

Wallowing in sorrow.

I've been much too depressed to post anything lately. When my sister and her kids were here visiting, we had such a great day at the lake. I had photos of Jack and Creed wakeboarding, Stella grinning at me in her cavewoman swimsuit wearing Ryan's sunglasses, Creed enjoying a Coke in the back seat of the Yukon after hours of swimming, Jack sporting the sweetest lifejacket known to man, Baby George chillin' on the boat stuffed way up under the nose under the driver seat, a group shot Me, Ryan, Mom, Liz, Jack, Creed, Stella, George, Auntie Kim, and Chris Garff. I accidentally deleted EVERYTHING before I got it downloaded. I've been in mourning. Too depressing to think about. Cannot continue posting.